Russell Wilson Isn't Corny, You're Just Used To Dysfunction: A Drag
Now usually I don't use this space to write candidly on celebrity happenings specifically. I like to use popular stories to address the more general issues facing our generation. I tend to not care too much about the fabulous lives of the rich and famous because, well, I drink water and mind my business. But today...TO-DAY, I've got the time.
Now, if you're unfamiliar with Ciara or Russell Wilson or the man who calls himself Future here's a brief rundown: Ciara was engaged to Percocet-loving rapper Future (who is the father of a bundle of children by different women--- yes, I have given CiCi her much needed side-eye for even getting involved in that mess). During that time, Ciara became pregnant with Future's child. They were headed for marital bliss even going so far as donning matching blonde dreadlocks in public. *sighs*. Somewhere between embracing his other 3 baby mamas and becoming his 4th, Ciara had enough. Future was irresponsible, unfaithful and unwilling to give up drugs for his family. Chile, whew. But because we serve an on-time God, Ciara persevered. She gave birth to baby Future, dropped some pretty good music and snapped back into killer shape all with NFL quarterback, Russell Wilson on her arm. *three snaps in a circle*. Much to the chagrin of Future, Ciara was happy and thriving. She had her baby and her man who loved her no matter how many bad decisions she'd made in love (she was also dating 50 Cent and Bow Wow at one point. She has a testimony). The firestorm truly started when Ciara was seen out with her new man with baby Future in tow. Some people argued it was too soon for the child to be around a man she was dating. Although, none of us knew how long she had been dating Russell, the assumption was that it was not long enough to introduce him to her child.
And all of the deadbeat dads and "pick me" women came together in a fiery fury against Ciara. Along with, you guessed it, Future himself. Father Future took to Twitter and the media to shame his ex-fiancee with TMI about their dating/sex life. Like a true gentleman.
Meanwhile, Russell Wilson married her. Pledged his life to her and her son. Publicly doted on her mothering skills and her womanhood whenever possible. And continues to do so to this day. But the hate has not stopped. Whenever Russell does anything to honor his WIFE you lot fix your ashy knuckles to jump on social media and call the man corny OR you remark about how miserable Ciara must be having "settled" for Russell. Are. Y'all. DRUNK? Seriously. You really, truly think the Princess of Crunk&B is sitting around crying codeine tears for Future while her millionaire husband showers her, and her children, with love and affection? You think that a man showing respect and admiration for the woman he's spending his life with is corny?! Who raised y'all? I know who. Men who believe that a woman only needs to be provided for and not emotionally protected. Women who are too afraid to ask for what they deserve because any man is better than no man. TV shows that reinforce the idea that the true test of a woman is in her ability to accept abuse of all kind because her true worth lies in her ability to forgive and forget. A whole generation that glorifies dysfunction over wholeness because it's more fun to talk about in your group chat.
Nah, I'm good.
If being in a committed, loving marriage with a man who identifies and praises your goodness means you've settled in life...then, I can't wait to settle. If having a man who's willing to love your children as his own means you're married to a "cornball" then point me to the nearest maze, baby. Don't let these 2017 "real men" make you question what you know is right. And don't let dysfunction become a norm in your life because you don't think what you deserve exists. I don't care what Keyshia Kaoir says, do you hear me? You do not owe a man your best years in exchange for his crusty last name. There is nothing charming about crying yourself to sleep, doing drivebys to see who's at his house or having your chest tighten every time an attractive woman walks by because your man has a wandering eye. Make peace, mutual respect and monogamy (if that's your desire!) paramount above drama---watch how the universe conspires to give you the love you seek. Refuse to succumb to the fear of lonely so much that you accept any ol thing. Not every great fairytale includes a tragedy. Sometimes the Prince is just...a prince.
Buy Iman's book here.